It’s A Wonderful Run has been on my running list for over a decade now. I’ve been keeping an eye on it and either the weather does not cooperate or it is too close to my fall marathon. This year everything came together perfectly so I was finally able to complete this race on my Bucket List!
The town of Seneca Falls, NY was the setting for Bedford Falls in the Wonderful Life movie. The location is just over an hour from me. While I really wanted to be able to do the race in person and run over the famous bridge in the movie, I did the Covid-safe virtual option.
Using my Garmin, I submitted my official results for the race. I am quite proud in that I was the first female Masters finisher and the second overall Masters finisher! This is the second time since I achieved Masters running status in 2019 that I have come in first place in a race!
The bell on the medal really does ring. It is most certainly a cherished medal. I am so happy that for medal 25 I was able to finally participate in It’s A Wonderful Run.
If you would like to support my race, please consider a donation to my favorite charity for homeless humans, Back on my Feet, or donate to your local no-kill animal shelter.
Completing It’s A Wonderful Run is a huge accomplishment for me. As I look to retire from competitive racing, I am so glad I was able to meet my goal in finishing this race.
For 2023, I only have one more medal to earn to achieve my life goal of 26 medals. I want to be able to retire from competitive running on my own terms before distance running is taken from me either from Covid or some other unfortunate health means.
I am feeling pressure in choosing a race for medal 26. I feel like it has to be something meaningful. I am reviewing my running bucket list to see what is feasible for 2023. In the meantime, I am so happy that It’s A Wonderful Run was medal 25.
Thank you to everyone who has supported me on my running journey thus far all these years. As the movie says, “no man is a failure who has friends.”
In 2012, I completed my Canadian Hat Trick in Montreal. This year, 2022, I completed my American Hat Trick thanks to Philadelphia! A few weeks ago, I completed the Italian Stallion Challenge portion of the Rocky Run! In completing the Italian Stallion Challenge, I ran a 5k, a 10k, and a half marathon. This medal trinity is meaningful in a few ways.
First, I now have a hat trick in both Canada and the USA. Luckily, I completed my Canadian hat trick a decade ago when I was still able to travel without much difficulty. Completing a hat trick in both countries checks off an item on my running bucket list.
A second item was checked off my running bucket list with the Rocky Run achievement. I have now achieved 8 medals from Philadelphia. Why are 8 Philadelphia medals significant?
When I chose my running tattoo, I chose the Philadelphia Marathon logo. Philly was my first half marathon. Philly was my first full marathon. At the time I had my running tattoo done, I had 8 medals. So when the Philly logo was tattooed on my arm, I had the artist add stars so that there are 8 stars that matched my 8 medals. My thinking at the time was that I would keep adding stars on my arm – one star for each medal. I would add stars in batches every few years to match my medal count.
Adding more stars to my existing tattoo has not been an option, for multiple reasons. Suffice it to say, I have 8 stars, and it will remain at 8 stars. Thus, the 8 stars needed a new meaning.
Since my running tattoo is to commemorate Philly being my first, I decided that the 8 stars would represent each one of my Philly medals. In completing the Italian Stallion Challenge portion of the Rocky Run, I now have 8 medals from Philly to match the 8 stars of my tattoo.
This is a huge item checked off my running bucket list.
My ultimate goal is to achieve 26 medals. Once I have achieved 26 medals, I will retire from competitive running. I will still run, but I won’t be focused as much on medal achievement. My goal for retirement is to be able to keep running until I die. My focus will change from full and half marathons to medals to being able to run the marathon of my life – I want to run until I die.
I am now registered for a race in December 2022 in which I will earn medal 26. The race I have scheduled for December is another race that has been on my running bucket list for a very long time.
That means that as I head into the 2023 running season, I will look to earn my 26th and final medal. That’s a tall order. I started looking at races for 2023 for medal 26. I did not realize how difficult it would be to choose a “final” race to earn medal 26. While I will continue to run even after achieving 26 medals, it will be the end of an era. It makes my choice of race for medal 26 feel like it is so significant. It is actually quite daunting trying to choose a race for medal 26.
For now, I am proud and content in the 24 medals I have earned. By the Grace of God, I look forward to earning medal 25 in a few weeks.
Once 26 medals have been achieved, I will have new running goals. I may try to run a certain amount of miles in a year, or a certain number of days in a row. We will see. I will keep running, but I will have new goals that no longer include chasing after medals. For now, though, I am still on the path of medal achievement. Here’s to medals 22, 23, and 24.
We all like vacation. At least, I haven’t met a person yet who doesn’t. Vacation is when we get to relax, unwind and have fun. We get to explore new places and experiences. Even if you stay home for a staycation, it’s nice to simply have the break from the workday.
One of the allures of vacation is empty spaces. Who doesn’t love a hotel room /Airbnb /other accommodation not your own home? Part of the love of hotel rooms come from the fact that they are practically a blank slate. A hotel room has the essentials – a bed, a bath, maybe a coffee maker. The only belongings you have in the hotel room to personalize it are those items that you really need for the length of your stay. That may be a bag of clothing and some toiletry items.
You drop your bag off at your hotel room and go out the door. You are free to explore without being weighed down by your earthly belongings. You feel free. Vacation is very enticing.
Minimalism allows us to create that same allure of vacation at home. You can curate your surroundings and your belongings to ensure that you are only surrounded by what you need and what you love. This is not to say that your walls should be barren and your cupboards empty. I’m just saying that if you get rid of the CLUTTER at home, you can capture that vacation feeling every day.
I say this, but even as a minimalist, I am not perfect. I have my weak spots. For me personally, the area of my home most likely to become cluttered, remain cluttered, and attract clutter quickly is my kitchen counter. They say the kitchen is the heart of the home, and mine is command central. It’s always been that way for me.
When I was working on my degrees, the kitchen was where I would do all my schoolwork. It was where I would write my 20-page papers and where I wrote both my masters’ thesis. My kitchen table is where I wrote my first novella and continue working on my second. I often put things on my kitchen counter that are in “transition.” For example, if I plan to make zucchini bread in the morning, I put all the ingredients on the kitchen counter the night before so everything is ready to go the next day.
It seems my kitchen counter is always in use. There is always something on it. It is always cluttered.
Last week I had a plumbing emergency in my kitchen that necessitated me completely emptying my kitchen counter. The experience was mind blowing. It took emptying the kitchen counter for me to realize just how much clutter was on the counter.
Once the plumbing issue was fixed, I did not want to return to the cluttered kitchen counter that had existed before the plumbing emergency. I was much more mindful of what I put back on the kitchen counter.
If it did not need to be on the kitchen counter, I set it aside. I have an entire basket of items that used to be on my kitchen counter that now need to be relocated. I do not want my kitchen counters to reach that level of clutter again.
They say when trying to declutter you should completely empty a space and then only put back what you absolutely need or love. It definitely works. I did not fully realize how absolutely cluttered my kitchen counters were until I completely emptied them.
If you are stuck in a rut on your minimalist journey, I highly recommend completely emptying a space. Only put things back that you need or truly love. All the things that don’t make the cut need to either leave or find a new place within your home.
The allure of vacation is that we get to stay in an uncluttered hotel room. You can capture the vacation feeling at home by reducing your clutter. It does not mean nothing. It means curating your space mindfully.
You may have noticed it’s been rather quiet here on RewindLiveSlow the past few months. That’s because I have been working on seeing my novella, A Rose Blooms at Golden Fork, to publication!
I am so grateful for early readers of my draft, an amazing editor (all mistakes are mine), and a fantastic illustrator. The first of a three-part series set in 1849 Gold Rush America, A Rose Blooms at Golden Fork follows Rose Davis’ journey from her homestead to the fictional mining town of Golden Fork somewhere in the American west.
The novella is available on Amazon kindle and as a paperback. Pull up a stool at the Lucky Shoe Saloon to watch Rose and Adelia’s love bloom as Rose follows her dreams of opening a hat shop on the frontier.
Part two of the Golden Fork series is currently in progress. In part two, we follow Harriet from Jasper’s General Store and Luella from the mill. The peddler makes a reappearance. We finally learn his name and his unexpected ties to one of the town residents. Golden Fork is growing and now has a newspaper and many other new businesses.
In addition to part two of the Golden Fork series, I have another work in progress. I am also working on my memoir that follows my journey achieving my marathons. Each chapter focuses on one of my medals. At this time, I am unsure which work will be available first – my memoir or Golden Fork part two.
Thank you to everyone who has supported me on this incredible journey with A Rose Blooms at Golden Fork. I appreciate you all. I hope that you find the novella enjoyable and are able to get lost for a little while in simpler times.
Rejoice! I have conquered! That is the phrase reportedly exclaimed at the end of the first marathon. This past weekend, I completed a half marathon to earn medal 21.
I had originally planned this half marathon benefitting Ukraine for last spring. Needless today, the weather and life did not cooperate for me to train and complete a spring race. Fall is traditionally running season. It is much easier to train through the summer for a fall race than it is to train through snowy and icy winters for a spring race.
The race benefitted United Help Ukraine, which is a charity that is sending medical supplies to Ukraine. I used my Garmin, and running around my village, completed the 13.1 miles to earn the medal.
I have now earned 21 medals on my way to my 26 medal retirement goal. I have another race this fall. I am hoping to run that race this weekend. The race is supposed to be in November, but given weather and my training schedule, I may be able to complete the distance early.
If all goes well, the “November” race will be my American hat trick. It is a race that will see me earn three medals if I am able to complete the Italian Stallion Challenge.
There is a sense of urgency to earning my 26 medals. The big unknown is how much longer I can do this. I am very fortunate in that I have not had covid. However, the American government not only expects everyone to get covid, they want people to get covid multiple times until it either kills you or permanently disables you. This is not a prospect I am looking forward to. I am trying to earn my 26 medals before I get covid. When American society refuses to mask and has a ”you do you” philosophy, it is only a matter of time before you get covid. No place is safe. The hospital has said repeatedly that if you don’t have covid when you go there, you will get it while you are there. We can’t even get healthcare without being exposed to covid.
Medal 21 is special to me, as I wanted to do something to help Ukraine. If I did not have the cats depending on me, I would have volunteered to go to Ukraine to fight. The American government has me on the euthanasia list in the pandemic, so they are completely fine with the idea of me dying in Ukraine. As much as I want to help, I do have three young ones depending on me.
While I am very proud of medal 21, I still have five medals to go to reach my retirement goal. It seems like it is always the times when you are so close to realizing a goal that it is precarious.
Hopefully this weekend the weather and my body will cooperate for me to complete my next race.
For today, we can Rejoice! I have conquered! Here is to medal 21.
August 30 is our 4 year anniversary of being in this house. We bought it on what would have been Ted Williams’ 100th birthday. The sole purpose of this house was to keep Jude, Simon and I together. Our apartment had been taken over by a new landlord who doubled the rent and stated the building needed to be pet free. We had to leave or be evicted. All other rentals in the area are either no pets or one pet only. What parent is going to choose between their children? I’m not. We had to stay together.
This house keeps us together. For Jolene, it is the only home she has ever known. Simon has been in the house longer than he was in the apartment. Jude will pass that milestone this winter. It will be another decade before I reach that milestone.
As grateful as I am that this house keeps us together, I don’t want to be here. I wish I could pick up the house and move it someplace else due to the bad neighbors. I can’t even use my living room or my front porch (both reasons why I even bought the damn house) due to the neighbors driving into the front of it twice now. Every day I live in fear that I will be murdered in my own house.
Selling this house will be difficult, as I will have to do the bad neighbors disclosure. It is also possible that by the time I sell, there will no longer be a garage and there will be many things that needs to be done to the house. I’m expecting that I will lose money when it comes time to sell. On top of that I will have to pay back $10k to the low-income program that helped me.
This will be the only home I ever own. I was repeatedly denied a mortgage due to my student loans. I am in PSLF. I had applied for forgiveness after 10 years of teaching. The only reason why I was approved for this house and my mortgage is that the bank thought my student loans would be forgiven through PSLF. Boy, were they wrong. Here I am in this house and about to enter year 26 of student loan repayment with no end in sight. I have been denied student loan forgiveness twice now. Brandon refuses to forgive student loans, instead choosing to simply waive a few months of interest. I know I will never be approved to buy another house due to my student loans. Once I sell this one, I will be stuck as a renter for the rest of my life.
This house is what is keeping us together. You can’t have pets in apartments here.
Once the cats pass away from natural causes, I do intend to sell the house. I won’t need it anymore. I don’t want to be here. I will be leaving the country and moving someplace more affordable that also has healthcare. I will, after all, be paying my student loans until I die. I need to decrease expenses as much as possible,
So, while we celebrate the fact that we have been in this house for 4 years and that it is keeping us together, I am also looking forward to the day when I can sell it and leave the country permanently.
My only goal is to outlive the cats. They need to be together, cared for, and loved. This house keeps us together.
We are so grateful to be together in these horrible times we live. Thank you for this house keeping the 4 of us together. Here’s hoping it holds up long enough to keep us together for the rest of Jude, Simon and Jolene’s natural lives. I just need to outlive them and keep us all together. This house keeps us together. Happy house-iversary.
Happy 8th Birthday, Jolene! The queen of our castle brings so much life and love to all of our lives. We are so fortunate that she chose me to adopt her. She had no way of knowing that Jude and Simon awaited her at home.
Jolene was 5 years old when she was found dumped in the parking lot of the animal shelter with a box of her kittens. She was quite literally dumped – when shelter staff arrived for the day, they found her trying to put kittens back into the box that had bounced out when the box was presumably thrown from a vehicle.
Jolene nursed her kittens and raised them well. One by one, Jolene watched her kittens be adopted. Everyone wants a kitten. They are fluffy and cute. Jolene was in the shelter for 5 long months before I came in. I wasn’t even looking for another cat. I had been looking for a cat friendly dog.
I had been visiting the animal shelter for about a year in search of a cat friendly dog that I thought would work well with Jude and Simon. I even had a name picked out – Benny. It was going to be Benny and the cats. Each time I visited the dogs, I would also visit the cats to socialize them.
One particular day, I walked into the cat room to socialize them when I noticed a tiny orange cat in a lower cage in the corner aggressively pawing the glass. That cat wanted attention. To be honest, I tried to ignore the tiny orange cat for two reasons. First, I am heartbroken over the passing of Kip in 2013, who was orange. I had been avoiding orange cats because they reminded me of Kip. Second, this orange cat was tiny. I thought the tiny cat was a kitten. I was purposefully trying to socialize and pay attention to the shy cats and the older cats who tend to be overlooked more at shelters.
Well, don’t judge a book by it’s cover. That tiny orange cat in the corner was persistent. I walked over to see what all the fuss was about. Much to my surprise, the tiny orange cat was not a kitten at all, but a 5 year old mother whose kittens had all been adopted. I was surprised to see an orange female.
I took Jolene (known in the shelter as Mamba for how good a mother she was to her kittens), out of the cage. She hugged me immediately and would not let go. I took her to the front desk and they were surprised to see me out of the cat room with her. That is how tightly she was holding onto me. We were given a private room for some socialization and together time. I put her down – much to her protest. She did not want to be down. She wanted to sit in my lap. She just wanted to be with me. She wanted to be held. She wanted to be loved.
Jolene picked me out. I never planned on a third cat. After raising 4 boys – Kitty (OTRB), Kip (OTRB0, Jude, and Simon, I never expected a girl. Here was Jolene. Jolene has my girl baby name.
Jolene had some health problems. Specifically a genetic disorder that effects her teeth and some issues with her ears. She had three surgeries before I brought her home. Due to the surgeries, her introduction to the boys was much slower than we normally do. We favor the slow introduction for new cats to the home to set them up for success for the best, loving relationship possible. We typically spend several weeks working on the slow introduction process.
With Jolene, it took several months to introduce her to the boys due to her surgeries. I wanted to be sure she was fully recovered before introducing her. I didn’t want the boys to play too rough with her or for the introductions to go poorly and for it to effect her recovery. We took the introductions very slowly.
I’m glad we did. The boys both love Jolene and are very gentle with her. Jolene is truly the heart of our household. She brings so much life and joy to all of us. Jolene is exactly what we needed to complete our family. We didn’t even know it until she arrived.
Jolene is our head bird watcher and loves chattering away at the chickadees. She is with me constantly. She knows her name and comes when called. She is constantly bringing me her babies – stuffies that look like small kittens. She makes a noise when she is “transporting” her stuffies to my location. If I leave the house, I come home to a stuffie near the door. When I wake up in the morning, I find she has put her “babies” in bed with me.
Jolene is loved by both Jude and Simon. Jude and Simon can play rather rough with each other at times. However, they are both gentle when interacting with Jolene. They play and chase her, but do not tend to be as rough with Jolene as the boys are with each other.
While Simon is bigger than Jolene, he is younger. Sometimes it seems like Jolene tries to mother Simon. The way Jude interacts with Jolene reminds me of how Jude was with Kitty when Kitty had cancer. Jude will play with Jolene, but not rough, and leaves her alone when she has had enough. Jude is loving but respectful of Jolene. Jude may be the man of the house, but Jolene is truly the Queen of the castle.
I’m so glad I took a chance on the “orange kitten” who turned out to be an older mom. Jolene brings so much love and joy to all of us. She truly picked me out that day at the shelter. Yes, it’s possible she just wanted attention. Maybe she would have pawed and acted all freaked out to anyone who had walked into the room that day. Yet I can’t get over the way she hugged me when I took her out and would not let go.
I am so blessed to have Jolene in my life. The boys and I both love her. At age 5, Jolene was the oldest cat at adoption for me. I am so glad I did not overlook this older mom who has so much love for us.
The next time you are in the shelter looking to adopt, please take time to consider the older ones, the shy ones, the mothers. Everyone wants a kitten. They all have so much love to give. I’m so glad this older mom picked me out to be her forever home.
Happy 8th Birthday, Jolene. We love you so much.
Please remember that until August 30, you can use our code JSJR10 at happyandpolly.com to save 10% off your purchase. For every purchase using our discount code, 5% will be donated to our local rescue to help other cats just like Jolene.
During a recent conversation with someone, I came to the realization that I used to have a life. You are probably laughing, but it’s true. I had a very full, active life before the pandemic. I ran marathons with 40,000+ people, I traveled all over the USA and into Canada, I went to coffee shops, the library, and was gearing up for a run for local political office before the pandemic hit.
As an immune compromised person in the pandemic, my life literally stopped in March 2020. I have not been in a store since February 2020. I have not been indoors with other humans except for medical care and essential house maintenance. I have not been touched or hugged. I am alone with the cats. The only reason why I even drive anymore is because the mechanic told me not to let the car sit. I need to take it out at least once a week to be sure it will be in working order when I do need to drive it to a medical appointment.
Before the pandemic, I had a full life. I ran a book club at the local library. I wanted to run for local office to make my community a better place. That all stopped. Now life has become an act of survival. I’m just trying to outlive the cats to keep them all together. I am also trying to realize my goal of reaching 26 medals. I want to achieve 26 medals before I get covid in the off-chance that it doesn’t kill me like it has everyone I know. There is a very tiny possibility it will only permanently disable me and not kill me.
The pandemic is a huge line in the sand between before and after.
Despite what the government may say, the pandemic is not over, by the way. The refrigerated truck returned to town this weekend for the dead bodies. Yes, here we are August 2022 and once again the hospital cannot keep up with all the dead bodies from covid, so the refrigerated trucks have returned. That’s ok. Just keep living your life like it’s 2019 without bothering to wear a mask.
As an immune compromised person, at this point in the pandemic, I am just waiting to die. After all, I am on the government euthanasia list. America does not like to talk about the death clinics that were open for 7 weeks in the fall of 2021. The government wants people with disabilities to die. So keep going out and socializing with no mask like covid is over while the bodies pile up in refrigerated trucks and mass graves once again.
My life as I knew it ended when the pandemic started. It has been a hard realization that life will never be the same again. No one cares if I live or die. In fact, every maskless person in this country is actively trying to murder people like me. It’s America. Murder is acceptable, after all.
Moving forward, my only goal is to attempt to outlive the cats so I can give them the best life possible and keep them together. I have no other purpose in life. The entire country wants people “like me” to die in the pandemic. The CDC even says that people like me are the ones who SHOULD die.
My life may not matter to you, but it matters to the three furry lives I have saved.
In order to keep us together and for me to fulfill my obligation to them, we need to pay the bills to keep us all together. We also need healthcare.
The biggest obstacle is figuring out new ways to make money and bring in income. The economy is more important than any human life in America. All Americans are expendable. I am not willing to risk my life for any job. There is no job on this planet that is worth risking your life.
So this is now a time of reinvention. I need to figure out how to bring in income in a way that does not threaten my life. While the government wants everyone to work in person and does not care who dies of covid, I am not willing to risk my life for the economy.
Moving forward, I am looking for ways to bring in passive income, freelance, and work online. My doctors say I am only supposed to have fully masked outdoor visits, so I can no longer work in person. This is going to be my life for probably the foreseeable future. I need to learn to pivot to a 100% online format.
Some ventures I am looking into include accepting donation for writing this blog through buymeacoffee/rachelgoes262
I am also looking into publishing an e-book in the near future. To be honest, I am hoping that the book just sells enough to cover its publication. We will see.
Anyone else have any suggestions for how to bring in income virtually? I need to recreate my life so that we can survive the pandemic. How has your life changed now that we have been reduced to survival?
Most people want to make a difference in the world and for their life to have meaning. This has become especially poignant in the pandemic with so many people dying. For me, the best thing I have done in my life is the cats. I like to think that I gave Kip and Kiity good lives with lots of love. I am trying to do the same for Jude, Simon and Jolene.
Since losing the majority of our humans in the pandemic, we have been fortunate to have many friends on Twitter. The COVID situation in American is bleak, dire, and the worst it has ever been at any time in the pandemic. It is a struggle to survive and be able to realize my goal of outliving the cats so I can keep them together.
While the government may have my name on a euthanasia list and says my life is meaningless, my personal goal is to make the world around me a better place for pets. I do my best to be a good cat mom. I keep Jude, Simon and Jolene together and strive for them to be healthy, happy and loved.
Each month I also try to do a donation to an animal shelter. I am unable to adopt any more pets. I am not able to volunteer. I want to help as much as possible, so I try to make a donation to a shelter each month.
As the result of our Twitter presence, we were approached by pet luxury company Happy and Polly to take part in a promotion they have. We received a free item, a post box cat toy. We post photos on Twitter of the cats playing with the postbox tagging Happy and Polly for a month. We have a discount code, JSJR10 that people can use for 10% off their purchase from Happy and Polly.
There is more. For every purchase made using our discount code JSJR10, we receive 5% for helping to promote the company. We have entered into an agreement with local non-profit volunteer rescue CNY SNAP. Our 5% from the Happy and Polly promotion will be donated to CNY SNAP.
CNY SNAP is the shelter from which I adopted Simon. They are the cleanest, kindest shelter I have encountered. Simon was well cared for when I adopted him. CNY SNAP is also the shelter that helped me trap two of the outside cats this past winter. We were able to get two of the outside cats off the streets in the winter and away from the dog fighting ring. They have since been adopted into loving homes.
There are still three outside cats that need to be trapped and taken into shelter to be adopted. I am waiting for CNY SNAP to have room to be able to take them in. CNY SNAP is run 100% by volunteers and is the largest cat rescue in my area.
Jolene’s birthday is coming up on August 24, and our Happy and Polly promotion runs through the month of August. In addition to using the promotion to raise money for CNY SNAP, I am hoping to use this opportunity to highlight Jolene during her birthday month. I want to bring awareness to mother cats.
Jolene had been dumped at the shelter in a box of her kittens. She was 5 years old. When I say dumped, she was literally dumped. Some of the kittens bounced out of the box when it was thrown out of the vehicle. The shelter volunteers found Jolene trying to get the kittens who had bounced out back into the box with her/the rest of the kittens.
Of course, Jolene loved and nursed her kittens. I have a photo of her nursing her kittens in the shelter. All of the kittens were adopted. Kittens are cute and fluffy. Everyone wants a kitten.
The moms take longer to adopt. Jolene watched all of her kittens be adopted. She waited at the shelter an additional 6 months before she picked me out to adopt her. I was not planning on a third cat. I was at the shelter to adopt a dog. I was not finding a dog that would be a good fit for Jude, Simon and I, so I volunteered to socialize the cats. Jolene was in a cage at the far end of the room, at the bottom in a corner. She threw a fit when I walked into the room, making her presence known.
Jolene picked me out from the moment I walked in the room.
Jolene is the first girl I have adopted. She has my girl baby name. I am so blessed to have her. She may be spayed after having her kittens, but she still carries around her stuffie “babies.” She often brings them to me where ever I am in the house.
Mother cats and older cats have so much love to give. Everyone is drawn to kittens. Please take time to look at the mother cats, the older cats, the shy cats. They all have so much love. They all deserve a loving home.
Since my life is going to be short in the pandemic, given the government’s desire to see me dead, my only goal now in life is to try to help pets as much as possible. I need to care for Jude, Simon and Jolene. I am trying to help animal shelters and homeless pets as much as I can.
Money is tight now for all of us. Even if you cannot donate right now, consider putting an extra can of cat food in your shopping cart, or even some extra paper towels. You can donate old towels and sheets to help animal shelters as well.
If you are financially able, please consider our Happy and Polly promotion. Happy and Polly has items for both cats and dogs. They ship to difference countries. You get a fun item for your pet and save 10% using our code JSJR10. The 5% of your purchase that comes to us will be donated to CNY SNAP to help the homeless cats in rescue. Everyone wins! Our code is good through August 30. Go to http://www.happyandpolly.com
There is so much evil in the world right now. Please be the good human your pet thinks you are. Try to make the world a better place by helping the animals and animal shelters around you.
It’s been well over 5 years now since Afshin died. I was working my dream job at the time. I was the human resources / training supervisor for a prestigious American research firm that worked projects not only across the country but also internationally. I supervised over 50 employees.
There are many people and moments during the course of my time working my dream job that stick out, and one of them is Afshin. We will use his first name to respect the privacy of the deceased.
I remember Afshin as a good worker, but even more importantly, as an amazing human being. He was one of those people that when they pass, you wish you had the opportunity to have more conversations with them. They just brought so much joy and life to those around them and had so much to give.
In fact, I remember Afshin’s work as exceptional. He had even been offered a management position, and turned it down. He said that he preferred to remain in the job he was doing. We were always hopeful that he would change his mind about the management position, but he never did.
Afshin was highly educated with an engineering degree, yet he stayed in an entry level position at a research firm. I remember in some of my conversations with Afshin learning that he was brought to the USA by his parents from a very young age. Unfortunately, I do not remember what country they immigrated from, just that it was a war-torn country and they had come here for a better life. Afshin said both of his immigrant parents worked hard and sacrificed so that he could get his engineering degree from an Ivy League school.
Both of his parents had already passed away by the time he started working for us. The rest of his family in their home country had been killed. Some of the family members were confirmed dead. Others were presumed dead, as he was never able to locate any living family members. Afshin was truly alone in the world.
He had many friends at work. Everyone loved Afshin. We always made sure he had invitations for holidays. People enjoyed spending time with Afshin. He was just a great guy.
So it was extremely unusual when Afshin did not show up for work two days in a row. No one could get ahold of him. This was not normal.
The day that Afshin died, he had been out to a movie with a friend from work. The friend remembers they talked for a little bit after the movie, then went home.
Afshin lived in an apartment alone and did not show up for work for two days. We contacted police to do a wellness check. Afshin was found dead and alone in his apartment.
The coroner determined that there was no foul play involved in his death. However, there are questions as to whether it was intentional or accidental. As a friend who valued Afshin, I like to think it was accidental. As someone with experience performing psychological autopsies, I’m afraid it looks intentional.
Whether accidental or intentional, his death was a horrible tragedy. There was not a single employee in our company who Afshin did not touch in a positive way. The entire organization was in grieving.
As Afshin had no family and no will, his body became a “Ward of the State” in New York State. This means that the Adult Protective Office was responsible for his corpse and in charge of his remains.
Did Afshin want to be buried? Did Afshin want to be cremated? No one knew. As a Ward of the State, it did not matter. His life, death, and corpse became just another piece of paper that some bureaucrat in the Adult Protective Office pushed across their desk.
Do you know what happens when a corpse becomes a Ward of the State and the Adult Protective Office is declared the guardian?
I will tell you.
First off, heaven forbid you have any friends that care about you. Friends have zero legal standing when you have no will and no family. The State does not care. You are just a dead body they don’t want and are now responsible for disposing.
As his employer, we fought for information about Afshin’s corpse and what would happen to him. First off, how many employers would fight for a dead employee like that? We did. We cared.
Deceased Wards of the State are buried in an open field. There is no funeral, no graveside service. There is no stone or grave marker. The deceased body Is quite literally given latitude and longitude coordinates of where it is buried. That is it. These latitude and longitude coordinates are marked in a file. The file is placed in a drawer for 7 years. After 7 years, the file is shredded. You are gone, dead and buried with no grave marker and not even a human that knows the latitude and longitude coordinates of where your body is located.
We fought tooth and nail to get those latitude and longitude coordinates disclosed to us. Would the Adult Protective Office let us know when they planned the burial so we could have a small group stand there with respect and offer prayers? No. They refused to release that information. Graves are dug at night and never announced. The Adult Protective Office does not want anyone there. They don’t want anyone to know they are burying some poor person who died with no family, no will, and no money.
We were able to obtain the latitude and longitude coordinates of where Afshin was buried after he was buried there. Of course, that’s assuming he actually is buried there. They could have just provided us with random coordinates. Maybe they provide the same set of coordinates to any friend of a deceased person who inquires.
Once provided the coordinates, of course we visited. It took a GPS to find the location. There was no marker. It was just an open field. Families could have picnics there. Children could play tag. No one would know they were playing on a mass grave site of poor people who have been buried as Wards of the State.
My employer paid for a marker for Afshin. We had to go through several hoops to have a marker placed at his coordinates. The marker was so small, we could only put his name. There was not enough room for dates. We were allowed a small phrase. The phrase we chose was “A Kind Soul.” There is a small marker with his name that says “A Kind Soul” and nothing else. That is all that remains of Afshin.
I have a feeling that the only reason at all why we were able to get coordinates and other information we did from Adult Protective Office was because we were the employer. Also, this happened in a relatively small city, where you could get people to show some compassion in certain situations. I’m sure if this had happened in a much larger city, we would not have gotten the coordinates or any other information we did.
Both Afshin’s life and his death is something that I’m sure will stay with me for a very long time. I have never before known someone whose corpse became a Ward of the State under the supervision of Adult Protective Office.
Afshin should be remembered for his life. He was A Kind Soul. He was an amazing person. His death was a tragedy. The way his corpse was treated as a Ward of the State was horrific. There has got to be a better way to honor the dead than burying them unmarked with just a latitude and longitude coordinate to mark the body.
I’m not sure what the answer is here. I just know that Afshin deserved better.
To be completely honest, I do not want a death like Afshin’s. I want to matter. I want someone to care. For the record, we cared. We were his coworkers. We were his friends. It was just a challenge that as friends, we felt completely helpless when he died because we had no legal ground to be able to have a service or handle any arrangements. The last thing anyone wants in death is to become a Ward of the State.
rewindliveslow 